Past and Present

Virginia Woolf once said, "I can only note that the past is beautiful because one never realises an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don't have complete emotions about the present, only about the past."

Last night while having drinks with a dear friend, I told her of my ambitions to write more and maybe start a blog. She asked if I was lonely. On the contrary, I said. I now have a small window of time during the day to reflect and to simply be present in my world. I am blessed to have been given this quiet space.

One of my very first memories is of my sister. Our family was being uprooted by the military and being transported across the country. My sister and I wanted to haul our swing set across country with us. Everything was packed. My dad, my three year old sister and  I stood up on the hill where our swing set had lived for the past three years. It was a wonderful piece of metal that held for us memories of our friends. Memories that too soon would perish in our thoughts. Here was one piece of tangible evidence that we had lived and loved. With no avail, my Dad tried to pull up the swing set poles out of the cement. No luck. My sister, bundled up in her denim blue jacket with a cute red brimmed hood came along and wrapped her arms around one of the poles. She pulled and the pole was uprooted. That is my  last memory of the swing set. I could not tell you if it traveled with us. Reflecting back on this memory my emotions are raw. I see a strong determined little girl who was brave enough to tackle  the impossible.

The emotions that connect me with my past are still present today. My sister is no longer three years old but a strong determined woman, brave enough to tackle the impossible. Her third child (all under the age of three) was just born in January and she looks terrific. I cannot remember the last time I heard her complain (even when her whole household is on week three of flu/sickness). She makes time for her friends (and dog) during the day and loves her husband fully. She takes great pictures and has a real talent for photographing babies. She has all the new photo equipment and practices daily on her kids. She makes time to catalog her life for her future and she loves me. I could go on....Fully grasping my emotions about my sister within the present is what brings ultimate beauty to the scenario.

Now I am going to go call her and tell her so.