Happenstance

It is a funny thing, happenstance. An accident, a coincidence, a fluke. My life is filled full of happenstance (that's how I met my husband). What am I to do with these chaotic happenings? How do I put them in order so that I may live a more purposeful life?

My not-so-little bundle of joy and I attend a YMCA class every week. Toddler Gym. A bunch of screaming banshees running around, tackling all sorts of play equipment. Flitting from one activity to the next. Singing, circle time, and we are done. I am exhausted.

Last week there happened to be a new teacher. Not all the right toys had been placed in the right areas. Of course my bundle of joy took notice. I told her she should, "go ask the teacher." She went running up to him screaming at the top of her voice, "slide, slide, slide, slide..."

He took one look at her and calmly said, "now lady, you seem old enough to make a sentence, let's try this. May."
She replied, "May."
Teacher said, "I."
She replied, "I."
Teacher said, "have."
She replied, "have."
Teacher said, "the slide please?"
She replied, "the slide please?"
I was mortified. Way too strict. I hoped he wasn't the permanent replacement. They walked to the closet and took out the slide.

A couple days later I found my home under attack; crazy kids were invading. Yelling, chanting, dancing, the decibel level was off the charts.
My not-so-little bundle of joy came running into the kitchen screaming, "drink, drink, drink, drink...."
I took a knee, held her by the shoulders and calmly said, "May."
She replied, "May."
I said, "I."
She replied, "I."
I said, "have."
She replied, "have."
I said, "a drink please?"
She replied, "a drink please?"
Wow. The screaming was gone. In its place was a toddler asking politely for a drink of water. ...Perfection. A fluke interaction had helped me save my home from the crazy invasion.

Six years ago, having just moved into the neighborhood, I started a friendship with a gal down the street. She had a baby about the same age as mine. One day she was gone. Disappeared. Divorced. Moved out of state. I was concerned, I didn't know the whole story. Late that night I rang up who I thought was her best friend. We talked. Six years later this woman has become one of my best friends.

A couple of months ago I was nursing my sick kid, a really sick kid. I had shipped my baby off to my mother-in-law's so as not to infect her. My kid was miserable. No fluids for hours. He refused. My husband was traveling. I called my best friend. I needed a shoulder to cry on.

No more than ten minutes later there was a care package on my doorstep. It was filled full of apple juice, soup, saltine crackers and beer (for me of course). I walked into my kid's room and told him that I had some "_____ (insert name of friend) juice" ready for him. He gulped it down. Anything from _______ (name of friend) is met by my kid as an awesome item (invention). At a very early age she was known by him as the "snack lady" and would feed him wonderful snacks on our walking routes.

She had saved me. She had saved my kid. She had possibly saved me a trip to the hospital. He kept on drinking. A happenchance telephone conversation six years ago. A self sacrificing friend.

A little while later my sister's kids were all sick with a flu virus that just wouldn't give up. I called her everyday to see if I could help. I would have done anything. I had fully learned how it felt to have a self sacrificing friend, and I wanted to be that friend to my friends. Excellent.

To live with my eyes wide open, to meditate upon all chance encounters, to absorb the lessons taught, to act upon all the teachings, this is the only way I can bring order to my life and begin to live more purposely. Life may be filled with chaotic, random, fluke moments that seem to have no order or purpose but by simply allowing myself to be shaped by these encounters I can begin to live a more commanding life.